UPDATED: TO POOR ENLISTED:

http://www.chowhound.com/post/city-pigeons-safe-eat-823571

THIS TOPIC SEEMS MORE APPROPRIATE AT THE CHILDREN'S LUNCH TABLES, ACCOMPANIED BY BURPING THE ALPHABET OUT IN ONE BREATH/FLIPPING ONE'S UPPER EYELIDS UP, TO SCARE PEOPLE. AT SOME POINT, E.G. AGE 38, IT SHOULD BE OUTGROWN.

***PLEASE REMEMBER, IT'S PAST TIME TO DE-LOUSE, DE-WORM, AND DE-FLEA EVERYONE, EVERY WEEKEND, FOR SIX MONTHS. THE YOUTH HOSTELS, SHELTERS, JAILS, PRISONS AND ALL U.S. MILITARY BARRACKS ARE GOING TO NEED TO BE DONATED 24 QTY OF EACH KIT PER PERSON. EVERYONE WILL NEED HIV, HEPATITIS C AND TUBERCULOSIS SKIN TESTS, ONCE PER MONTH, EVERY MONTH.***