TO ALL D.C. METRO'S GHETTOS AND BARRIOS: ON OPERATION "THE CROW":

http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=9nf4DhXy9oU

AS I CONTEMPLATED MY LEGACY, AT AGE 36, A COUPLE YEARS AGO, I REALIZED THAT ALTHOUGH I WAS BEATEN, BATTERED, AND SEXUALLY ABUSED BY ALMOST EVERYBODY, MY LIFE STILL HAD MEANING. THAT MEANING WAS TO SURVIVE THOSE THAI PIRATES, VIET CONG HIPPIES FROM THE AMERICAN RED CROSS IN A DANK, MALAYSIAN PRISON CAMP. I WAS A JEWISH FEMINIST, AND NOBODY COULD OUT-SURVIVE OR OUT-RUN ME. I BECAME MORE PSYCHO THAN THE TERRORISTS WHO CONTINUALLY CHASED AFTER ME.

I BECAMED WANTED DEAD, NOT ALIVE BY THE KKK. I STAGGERED INTO MY APARTMENT, EVERYDAY, HALFWAY DEAD FROM THE SWEAT OF HAULING IN THE BABY NURSERY ITEMS FOR A BUNCH OF BABIES, OF VARYING AGES. I PETITIONED, WITH THE ANCESTORS OF EVIL SLAVEMASTERS IN MIND, PRAYING FUTILELY THAT PATRICK HENRY WASN'T TRULY THE DEVIL SLAVEOWNERS OF HIS PEERS, ANTECESSORS, AND PREDECESSORS. DESPITE ALL TRAGEDIES, A BEACON OF LIGHT SHONE THROUGH OF HOPE. THE BABIES OF THE GHETTOS AND BARRIOS WERE ALIVE. THEY EVEN KNEW HOW TO READ.

LITERACY WAS OCURRING. THEY HOPEFULLY WILL ALL BECOME BETTER THAN ANY RADIOMAN. THEY WILL HOPEFULLY OUTWIT, AND OUTCOMPETE EVERY SEAL CANDIDATE. HALF MY WAKING HOURS, I ALLOCATED TO DECLARING WAR ON EVERY CARTEL, TERRORIST, GANGSTER, AND SEX OFFENDER, LIKE AN AUSSIE BANSHEE, WITH A BLUE-PAINTED, SAXON, WARRIOR FACE.

I TRIED TO INSTILL FEAR IN THOSE WHO THREATENED THE SOUTH VIETNAMESE ARMY RANGERS. HOPEFULLY, MANY ARREST WARRANTS WERE APPROVED. IF I CAN LEAD TO THE FRANTIC TACKLE AND RED FLAGGING OF ANYMORE GANGSTERS, I TRIED MY ABSOLUTE HARDEST.

I WENT TO THE ARLINGTON CEMETERY, EVERYDAY, MENTALLY, LIKE A PSYCHO, TO PSYCHE MYSELF UP FOR A MASSIVE WAR CAMPAIGN. I TRIED TO LEAD MORE VIRGINIAN VETERANS WITH PITCHFORKS, TO FLUSH OUT ANYMORE THREATS.

I TRIED TO WRITE, AS IF I WERE LAUNCHING MYSELF OFF OF WWF ROPES AT EVERY SUSPECT THAT ORGAN-HARVESTED THE VETERANS. MANY TIMES, I REMINDED MYSELF JUST HOW EVIL BEOWULF'S MOTHER WAS, AS I LAID DOWN, EXHAUSTED FROM THE HAULING OF ITEMS BIGGER THAN ME.

I REMEMBERED BOOT CAMP AND BECAME THE MOST DETERMINED RADIOMAN IN THE WORLD. I SURVIVED BEING T-BONED BY A JEEP GRAND CHEROKEE SUV. I AM INDEED THE GREATEST, MUCH LIKE MY FAVORITE SLEEP TEE-SHIRT, WITH THE MOHAMMED ALI QUOTE.

THE NUMBER ONES AND RAPIST, LEADING PETTY OFFICERS COULD NOT SURVIVE ME, THE NUMBER TWO. THEY WERE NOTHING. I AM THE MOST COMPULSIVE, TYPE A FEMALE THAT WILL BE THE ONLY SURVIVOR FROM COLORADO'S INTERNMENT CAMPS.

LIKE DAVE CHAPPELLE JOKED, I TOO WILL BITE THROUGH ALL CHAINS OF COLORADANS' KKK CIRCLES. I WILL ONLY LEAD TO THE ANNIHILATION OF THESE HELLS ANGELS. I AM FROM D.C. METRO'S GHETTOS. THESE CAUCASIAN, ISIL RAPE JIHADISTS WILL BE ERADICATED IN COLORADO. THEY WILL NOT SURVIVE MY GHETTOS.