TO ALL LATCHKEY ORPHANS FROM D.C. METRO GHETTOS:

ON ETSY.COM THEY CARRY SWEATSHIRTS THAT SAY, "THOU SHALT BE BADASS." WE'LL NEED THIS DONATED TO EVERY CHURCH IN LAKEWOOD, COLORADO, FOR DAILY BOOTCAMP CLASS INSTRUCTORS TO WEAR, WHO ARE WILLING TO VOLUNTEER AT THE PRISONS IN DENVER METRO.