UPDATED: TO D.E.A. DENVER, N.C.I.S. WHO ARE ASIAN AMERICAN FEMINISTS:

Your presence is nnecessary at The Point athletic club. Please bring everyone in who is/was employed there for drug-testing and retinal scanning. Please find out if it's appropriate for their employees to endorse drug use. Please also bring in all Aghanis and Afghani-American auto mechanics employed in Lakewood, Colorado for the same screening program.