TO ALL U.S. NAVY PETTY OFFICERS:

PLEASE LET THE ALABAMAN AFRICAN-AMERICAN, FEMINIST COMMUNITY KNOW (IN A PERSIAN ACCENT), THAT THERE SHOULD BE A COMEDY PLAY ABOUT THE U.S. NAVY'S ENLISTED, FEMALE, MINORITIES RIDING ZEBRAS TO RE-ENACT THE CIVIL WAR BATTLE AT BULL RUN. PLEASE BE INSPIRED BY THE MOVIE "CITY SLICKER."