Updated: To A.C.L.U., & N.A.A.C.P.:

We're going to need 5,000 GLBT feminist, class-action attorneys at Eiber Elementary School, Lakewood, Colorado. It's past time to bring a $1 million U.S.D. lawsuit on behalf of our minority, challenged and ESL students there.

This way there can be an afterschool, inclusive, co-ed, Brownies and Cub Scouts program there. We'll need the impoverished children, aged 5 to 7, in the school gym, cafeteria, library and playground for three hours, year-round, everyday, afterschool to participate in meals, safe bicycyling groups, tutoring, arts, music and physical education.

They'll all need free, bilingual swimming lessons, new athletic (Saucony/New Balance) sneakers, prescription, swimming goggles, and local recreational center passes once per week, year-round. They all need to be donated their own, brand new bicycles and bike helmets, with gloves, knee pads, and elbow pads. Also, they must be mentored by paid, bilingual, minority firefighters and EMT's in this program, so they can learn fire prevention and emergency communication skills.

For this to become a reality, the children will each need a free cellphone, with free, unlimited, in-state, T-Mobile coverage, designed for bilingual, challenged children, that includes GPS tracking. Each cellphone will need to be shockproofed, and waterproof.

The children require a free, shockproofed, waterproof e-book reader also, so they can participate in book/comic magazine social groups and Hooked On Phonics tutoring. They should have free, bilingual, magazine subscriptions to Highlights, Ranger Rick, and all age-appopriate magazines recommended by the Denver Public Libraries', bilingual, children's librarians. I hope that all major comic magazines, cartoon books, for ages 4 to 8, will be included, free, to promote boys' literacy.

***Please also ask Toys 'R' Us, T-Mobile, Best Buy, Geek Squad, Cisco, Avaya, Juniper, Microsoft, Oracle, Macintosh, IBM, BlackBerry, Whole Foods, and Sports Authority for donations to Eiber Elementary School in Lakewood, Colorado.***