How much extracurricular activities are too much for an only child, with a full-time homemaker mother, and an absentee father? That's a different dilemma than the average family of two point five children, a dog, a cat, and dual-income family. Beyond swimming at local pools, trips to the public library, or playing with local children at the playgrounds, there is an overwhelming pressure to have your child enrolled in every single activity, which isn't healthy, or realistic.
As I transitioned from a dual-military, working mother role to a full-time homemaker, I found social support in a group of Connecticut mothers, with children (one child was deceased from SIDS), another a social worker, and a full-time, homemaker father with two young children. That helped me to value how both my son and myself still needed to be social, with our own peer activities.
As a toddler, my son, Anthony was quite active, the most active child on the playgrounds. As he played with the girls, on the playgrounds at age two, I noticed he would get bullied by them. Sometimes it was throwing sand in his face, or rocks at him, in Bristol, Connecticut. I enrolled him in a Fun In Motion, Hooked On Phonics program at the local KinderCare, in Georgia. That helped his confidence immensely. I noticed that the bullies came from Caucasian, yuppie families, and the parents were outright racist.
There were still a couple times when I heard my bullied son muttering in his sleep at night about having to share toys at KinderCare, which was a challenge, as an only child, at age three. He became best friends with both his male, and female peers at KinderCare though. He seemed to be thriving, since he wasn't in an all-Caucasian environment, a great relief to myself also.
Apparently, the Fun In Motion program there, where he was learning basic, toddler gymnastic skills (forward rolls) included cardio conditioning. I highly recommend that program. They used gymnastic mats, making it quite safe for the children. He was quickly able to sprint up Stone Mountain Park (uphill), without stopping on afternoon, family hikes.
His favorite activity around pick-up time from KinderCare was to follow the cook into the kitchen for extra snacks. He was mastering computer skills, at age three, in his preschool phonics private tutoring, at the next KinderCare (Green Mountain, Lakewood, Colorado) by a licensed, preschool teacher. Their Hooked On Phonics, software program was impressive. Private tutoring at KinderCare was a definite confidence booster for him.
In Kindergarten, he was enrolled in private piano lessons, to help develop his self-esteem, fine motor skills, provide an emotional outlet, develop his neural pathways and attention span. He was able to play Fur Elise (by Beethoven), by the time he decided to discontinue his piano lessons at age nine, so musically, he is quite gifted.
Throughout elementary schools, he took Youth Day Team Sports Camps, Art Day Camp, Archery, Tae Kwon Do (non-competitively, without belt color pressures), Sailing Day Camp at Evergreen Lake, Winter Park Resort's Group Skiing Lessons, and a Science/Lego Afterschool Camp.
If it became too much, he had to take it in the summer times, or winter breaks, to lessen the school year pressures, since he had homework and enjoyed playing with all the neighbors' children, swimming at the recreation centers, ice skating, skiing, bicycling, bouldering, tree climbing, and going on playdates with classmate friends who lived further away.
Although, in Australia, he had five days per week of playdates, afterschool and regular, basketball activities, I feel I should have continued his martial arts, Tae Kwon Do lessons, and had him enrolled in "official" activities. He attended peer parties, dances, etc., with schoolmates, however. I sometimes wonder if an all-boys, private school, learning environment would have been healthier for him there though.
